Why the nice guys do finish last
Ever dated a Revenge Dater? Aka Mr. Nice Guy?
Well, a revenge dater recently contacted me on Facebook. An old acquaintance I was actually happy to hear from until he revealed that:
1) he used to be both attracted to me and intimidated by me (no biggie right? Brownie points for honesty)
2) he thought i was a cold, heartless, emasculating bitch (things kinda start going down hill from here)
3) he’s now doing well for himself (good for you!)
4) and can get ANY woman he wants (*roll eyes*)
5) including, you guessed it, bitches like me whom he used to put on a pedestal but now recognises aren’t even good enough for him (okaaaaaaaaaaaay…)
6) now they hit on him and he duly brushes them away like flies (after screwing them of course)
Lucky for me i’d dated a revenge dater before. You know the type, had no game in school, always got passed over by the girls and now has a brick on his shoulder. His philosophical outlook can be summed up by the phrase bitches ain’t shit.
Honestly, i had no idea that being a nerd or chubby or whatever else makes you a social outcast exacted such a psychological toll on men. We all have issues. i certainly have mine. But i never go out of my way to interact with someone knowing full well my intentions are far from honourable. And i certainly don’t hold a grudge for that long. WTF?
Of course the revenge dater likes to pass himself off as The Nice Guy, the one who would have treated you right if you had given him a chance…back when you were 14 years old. Give him a chance now and he will eviscerate you.
So, after meeting asshole #999 i have realised that there is a very good reason why i’m single and why i should spend less time on Facebook.
To the insecure men with fantasies of avenging a wounded pubescent manhood, a lil advice:
1) cockiness is not confidence
2) leave me alone. thank you!
Filed under: personal | 11 Comments
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I’ve dated two of those I think, but never knew a phrase was coined to descibe them.
Hmmm!! Thanks for the knowledge!
That guy is a very bitter man still living in the past with his insecurities!
I hope that you blocked him.
girl, i came up with that phrase! lol. i’ve been running into too many of them or rather they’ve been running into me!
there are real nice guys out there. this guy is just a fraud and an ass too cause I if I was doing stuff like that i wouldnt just blurt it out. still better to know than not.
I think he’s one of those guys who as you said was wounded but suddenly got to a spot that he never saw himself in so he thinks he has game and he’s trying to get at as many women as possible. sort of a to paraphrase mike jones (who?) “back then they didnt want me now i’m hot they all on me”.
he’s probably clueless to the fact that as much scheming as he’s doing there are probably women scheming on him too. ya going soon hear him say he got child support to pay.
true jdid, there must be some emotionally mature guys out there, somewhere…
the “nice” guys always complain about women overlooking them but its just that it’s hard to get to know someone who is too shy to approach you in the first place. simple as that. no alpha-woman conspiracy there.
when he contacted me i thought it was a sweet surprise, i had no idea that all these years he was just waiting to get back at me. WTF? since when was i ever that powerful?
Eh.. I sincerely doubt he was a “nice guy” to begin with. Most nice guys, who get overlooked during the 18-30 age period, become seriously sought-after commodities during the 30-45 age phase! And they tend to remain “nice” all during that time. Your guy sounds like an outright loser which is probably the reason women avoided him.
And to be honest, unless he is super-rich, super-attractive or super-endowed, I highly doubt he’s got as much game as he is trying to pretend.
A brick. Nice. That guy’s a fool, desperately trying to make up for those years of loneliness. If he really was a nice guy, he wouldn’t be doing that to women.
“Honestly, i had no idea that being a nerd or chubby or whatever else makes you a social outcast exacted such a psychological toll on men”
Thats the problem, girls never do, then when they get older, their excuse always is, it was just jr/sr high school.
Yes, but you can’t always win though. They are right–even if they are losers. Men do not have a “sell by” date. This guy might have found out late and now has gone off the rails; but he does have reason to “dance”. Sorry to say it.
If it’s any consolation, he’s not likely to be a very happy person; but remember not to claim all men are dogs (not necessarily you but anyone who thinks that way) if you’re going to scorn the nice ones so.
Sell by date??? WTF??? Nobody has one. People are not commodities to be used and discarded.
Points 1 – 3 yeah, believable, but the subsequent points, did he really tell you that ??? To achieve what ?
Question tho, Why do you seek to explain a mans behavior in adult life to something that happened while he was a teen ?
The reality is that these days many women who at school ” have overlooked” guys now find themselves looking at the same guys that they have overlooked.Two reasons mainly…. Not because these men now hold some magical appeal, but as Trinidad Adventist alluded to, the biologicla clock of women starts to kick in, and also, the men they overlooked are now/should be on the same maturity level.
How would you explain the ones who were not social outcasts in school, and still fall into the revenge dater category in adulthood ?
Hi,
Ugh, I liked!
Thanks
Robor